A Filey Clairvoyant
You will meet the Right Man and know it in two years time.
His name begins with,
I can’t quite distinguish
a P or B or R.’
Well, I’d had- a Bernard and Paul.
I feel sorry for Ray
tells me his fat
girlfriend just sits
He prepares all meals.
She just sits
reading Mills and Boon.
drinks and sleeps
Never together when out.
She with her friends, he with his.
He goes out,
returns she’s brandishing a knife,
where he’s been.
He is a designer
witty with it.
Manager at my workplace
he sends me a picture
of an American Indian
with palm up
and five statements on how
we should get together.
Why haven’t you moved out?
When my last marriage broke up
my wife got house and everything
and my girlfriend won’t move out.
He makes sense.
I want a boyfriend with either
motorbike or a landrover.
He’s just sold his bike.
Landrover is soft topped.
Takes me and Ben out walking
to Dark Peak.
We enjoy pictures rather than words.
He makes meals for the family.
My friends said if my last husband turns up
would not hesitate to lay him out.
We spend evenings planning places
things we can do, together.
socially when he drinks, like me.
Christmas he moves in.
On way out to a Parents evening
Ben’s school I tell him
We’ll talk when I return
On return I find all drink gone
him crashed out drunk in my bed.
In morning he says
Please forgive me.
Over the next month we go out
hold hands, and are gentle
down by the bridge while Ben plays
ahead with our dog.
Over next month he fills my wardrobes
with his clothes
my shelves with his CD’s.
Then I notice
him going to pub straight after work,
returns home crashes out to sleep.
he works drinks sleeps
Comes from work after pub
says he’s tired, sleeps rest of night
I wait for him downstairs.
I sit alone in house on an evening
or when he is in
he gawps at TV in bedroom.
He does not let me to go
out with my friends.
We go out again after I have words.
Two weeks later he is back
drunk and sleeping again.
On few occasions we go out
he leaves me on my own
he spends evening talking to a biker
or someone at bar.
I talk to his fat girlfriend Sophie.
She’d been holding a knife because she
was cutting veg, as she always did
preparing meals for him while he went
Out and got drunk.
He catches me talking to her
‘Don’t believe her, she’s a liar. She’ll say
anything to get me back with her.’
Tells me all the girls at work
are after him.
I talk to them.
They wouldn’t touch him.
He promises me I’ll not go drinking
starts excuses when I smell it on his breath
told him so.
I’ll go to a counselling session with you
He’s having none of it.
his tears when I phone him at local pub and tell him
Your stuffs in the driveway.
Down on his knees he is, tears and moans, begging me to reconsider. Says
Your right in everything you say. I’m at fault and I’ll change.
He is really suffering. I nearly break
but people never change.
I meet him a month or two later while out with my mates.
He comes in pub.
Sends one of his mates over to mr
Ray wants a private word
Whatever Ray has to say he can say while my mates are present.
Anyway he comes over.
he tells me
I feel nothing.
Mark is the man for me, but he is married and she is kind. I have known the family for ten years now. It is only recently I admit to myself I love Mark. I would not hurt their kids . I have seen them settle down round meal table of an evening. I come home, collapse on sofa and cry for I know we would be good together. want to settle down. For a time with Ray I forget about Mark. Ray never knew about him. I see Mark less. I will not move from this cul de sac because I feel safe with Mark down the road and the fabulous view of the moors. Perhaps because I love Mark I find it difficult to love anyone else. I’ll keep looking.